Evening Thought

They say that if a friendship lasts for more than seven years, it will last a lifetime.

That is bullshit. 

Fucking bullshit, man.

Turning 30 two years ago gave me a rude awakening about friendships. 

  • People show their true colors when you hit rock bottom.
  • If you have a friend who says “text me when you get home”, knowing that they live far from you, they are worth keeping.
  • It’s okay to miss a friend who no longer is in your life. For whatever reason it didn’t work out between you two, it doesn’t mean the love you have for that person will completely go away especially if you have a lot of good memories with him or her. 
  • You come first. Sorry, but you need to set up boundaries because some fucking people do not know what the hell that is.
  • There will be a time when you ask, “why am I friends with…?” If your answer says something like, “I feel used..blah blah”. My advice: turn your back on him or her.
  •  No one is worth risking your sanity. Who cares if you have been friends for decades..if that person brings out the worse parts of you—drop them out of your life!

Sorry for the depressing post. I found an item in my house and it triggered a lot of angry emotions. I’m burning it tomorrow.

What are You Telling me Dream?

I had a beautiful dream last night. The only thing I remember is that I ran to this fucking gorgeous man, strapped myself to him, and we explored a city while paragliding a couple hundred feet in the air. I remember seeing lots of bright lights, tall buildings, and billboards of random adverts for luxury items.

The gorgeous man and I kept laughing during the entire flight. Since I felt safe enough to place my life in his hands, I must have loved him.

Is this my future? God I hope so. Haha.

The thing that stands out about my dream is that when we landed someone approached me. She was mad and said something like, “so and so is pissed off at you for leaving”.

I looked up the internet for what could possibly mean about my dream. Two things that keep getting mentioned are that 1) I have big decision to make and 2) I need to confront something that has been nagging me for awhile now.

I am going with number one. Why not pick number two? Because I am getting all the fucking help I can with my past issues. Someone told me getting your shit together is a process; a painful process were you fall at least a hundred times until you get it right.

Great. Lovely. I am so fucked.

At least I get to spend some time with my mom today. She can sometimes be a calming influence on me when she wants to be. lol.

Have a great day reader.